norwich36: (Default)
norwich36 ([personal profile] norwich36) wrote2009-06-15 06:30 am
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Insta rec

Neon Showman by [livejournal.com profile] atimi (Jared/Jensen) This is Jared and Jensen's epic romance as seen by Chad Michael Murray, and it made me laugh so hard I think I injured myself. Highly, highly recommended for some of the funniest dialogue--and internal monologue--I've ever read. A sample quote behind the cut:

Yeah." He looked down, eyes unreadable in the darkness. "I told you, [Jensen]'s a good guy."

"Hmm. Is that a good guy in a 'hang out and have beers' kind of way or in a 'future possible soulmate' kind of way?"

"Well, it's not in a 'help bribe the hooker not to go to the authorities' kind of way," Jared replied with a smirk. "You've got that one in the bag."

Flattery would only get him so far and Chad snorted. "As useful as I am in hooker-adjacent scenarios, you are not dodging the question that easily. C'mon, help me out here - are we talking Batman and Robin or Brokeback Mountain with you two?"

"I love that you picked the world's gayest superheroes as your example of straight guys."

Chad's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What're you talking about?" As far as he was concerned, Batman and Robin were the rubber-clad poster boys for heterosexuality.

"You're kidding me, right?" Jared stood upright again, shaking his head in disbelief. "Did you not see the rubber nipples in the last Clooney version? Rubber nipples, dude. That and full body gimp suits put them one step away from having their own float in the gay pride parade." He leaned in, adding teasingly, "Holy buttfuck, Batman!"

"Ew." Batting away Jared's looming head, he pointed a finger at his face. "You're fucking sick, you know that? You don't go round saying shit like that about national icons!" He rubbed his temples, rapidly revising his opinion of his friend. "First Liberace, now Batman... I don't care if you do like schtupping it to a dude, you don't get to look at everyone else through rainbow-tinted lenses. Batman's rubber nipples are one hundred percent straight."

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