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vibrator review
After all, what's a little TMI between friends?
Do I need to disclaim a vibrator review like I would a fic review? The opinions expressed herein reflect only those of Nora Norwich and are not intended to reflect the viewpoint of Generic Woman TM or even Generic Happy Fangirls TM. Nora Norwich can only speak on behalf of her own clitoris, not anyone else's. Nora Norwich is not a paid endorser of Good Vibrations, even though she probably sounds like one. Nora Norwich apologizes for all the vibrators she's not mentioning in this review, and wants to reassure them that if they keep humming along happily and maybe get new batteries, they're sure to find willing users.
Ah, vibrators. My first experiences with a vibrator almost turned me off them for life. I felt so adult, and so deliciously naughty, buying my first vibrator at the age of 19 in an adult bookstore. It was a battery-operated hybrid of metal and plastic, with the seam joining the materials almost guaranteed to pinch your delicate flesh precisely where you least wanted to be pinched, and it seemed to have only two settings: "painful" and "guaranteed to sand your clitoris right off your body." I kept trying to use it, sure I was just doing something wrong, but in the end I gave up. Periodically I would try other vibrators, both models I found in sex shops and those sold in drug stores disguised as "massage aids," but invariably they ended up causing me pain. I figured I just wasn't a vibrator person.
And then, gentle reader, my life was forever transformed by the realization that vibrators come in lower intensities! One evening I was browsing the Good Vibrations website and discovered that they actually rated their vibrators according to intensity. What a revolutionary idea! I remember being tremendously excited, especially since I was having some joint problems in my hands which were at the time causing autoerotic difficulties.
I ended up ordering one of the cheaper models on the low end of the intensity scale--the Crystal Jelly Deluxe --and I realized that I was a vibrator person after all. A very happy vibrator person, in fact. I used that model until I literally wore it out--the plastic dial broke after two and a half years, which seemed like a pretty good run for an $18 vibrator. I replaced it with an identical model, because I'm nothing if not brand loyal, and there really aren't a lot of vibrators to choose from at the low end of the intensity scale. (Is my clit just hypersensitive? Really, some of the more intense models scare me a little). I also like the fact that the Crystal Jelly is fairly quiet, and it has a good texture. When it comes to things I rub against my sensitive bits, I prefer squishy and pliable to metallic or plastic. The little nubby things can be fun, too. Theoretically this vibrator is also a G-spot stimulator, but as long as I'm in TMI land I may as well say that the main thing I experience when my G spot is stimulated is an overwhelming urge to pee, so I can't speak to its functionality in that particular area.
A couple years ago I thought I would branch out into other models. I was curious whether the more expensive vibrators were actually worth the money, and after doing a lot of research I finally ended up with the G-twist vibe, which costs about $65. I picked it in part because it had several features I liked in the Crystal Jelly: it's quiet, it's got a soft squishy surface rather than a hard plastic one, and it's relatively low-intensity (though rated a 3 rather than a 2 on the Good Vibes scale, which is bordering on a little too intense for me sometimes). It comes in a whole range of attractive colors. (I picked purple, because I may as well think of Lex Luthor when I'm, um, thinking of Lex Luthor).
It's also silicone, which means it's more nonporous and easier to clean, and it's got some lovely ridges winding all around it that I didn't originally think would matter very much but turn out to be a very pleasant feature, indeed. The G twist model does have two drawbacks, however: the mechanism to remove the cap to place the batteries is very difficult to open, and the mechanism for adjusting the power levels is too easy to accidentally switch on. I've ended up draining the batteries unintentionally quite a few times because of that. I recommend rechargeable batteries, by the way. One's orgasms should not be endagering the planet, if one can possibly avoid that outcome.
And for that reason, I'd been looking for a vibrator that sat on a recharging base. Good Vibrations has several of these, but the one I've been lusting after for the last six months or so was the Womolia. 9 speeds! Medical grade materials! Rechargeable! Plus I just thought it looked pretty cool. But $132 seemed a lot of money to drop on a vibrator when I already had two perfectly functional ones. After dithering around for a long time, last week I finally gave into temptation and bought it.
So was it worth $132? I think probably yes, at least for me, for several reasons. I love the variations in the speed--both the low and medium intensity ranges work really well for me. I also think it's absolutely perfectly shaped for my body (though your body may vary). One thing I really love about it is the fact that it has three modes: one with constant buzzing, one that pulses at regular intervals, and one that pulses at irregular intervals--and you can use any of the three speeds in the three modes. It's particularly helpful for me because I have some incipient carpal tunnel issues, so that fact that I can set it on pulse mode means it can be very effective as a hands-free vibrator, which is something I'd been looking for for a while. There is one serious drawback, though: the higher speeds are very noisy. The buzzing sounds like an alarm clock going off, which can be rather distracting! Nevertheless, I find the pulsing mode to be very, very awesome. If you can put up with the noise factor and the high cost factor, I would definitely recommend it.
So what about you--do you have any good vibrators to recommend?
Do I need to disclaim a vibrator review like I would a fic review? The opinions expressed herein reflect only those of Nora Norwich and are not intended to reflect the viewpoint of Generic Woman TM or even Generic Happy Fangirls TM. Nora Norwich can only speak on behalf of her own clitoris, not anyone else's. Nora Norwich is not a paid endorser of Good Vibrations, even though she probably sounds like one. Nora Norwich apologizes for all the vibrators she's not mentioning in this review, and wants to reassure them that if they keep humming along happily and maybe get new batteries, they're sure to find willing users.
Ah, vibrators. My first experiences with a vibrator almost turned me off them for life. I felt so adult, and so deliciously naughty, buying my first vibrator at the age of 19 in an adult bookstore. It was a battery-operated hybrid of metal and plastic, with the seam joining the materials almost guaranteed to pinch your delicate flesh precisely where you least wanted to be pinched, and it seemed to have only two settings: "painful" and "guaranteed to sand your clitoris right off your body." I kept trying to use it, sure I was just doing something wrong, but in the end I gave up. Periodically I would try other vibrators, both models I found in sex shops and those sold in drug stores disguised as "massage aids," but invariably they ended up causing me pain. I figured I just wasn't a vibrator person.
And then, gentle reader, my life was forever transformed by the realization that vibrators come in lower intensities! One evening I was browsing the Good Vibrations website and discovered that they actually rated their vibrators according to intensity. What a revolutionary idea! I remember being tremendously excited, especially since I was having some joint problems in my hands which were at the time causing autoerotic difficulties.
I ended up ordering one of the cheaper models on the low end of the intensity scale--the Crystal Jelly Deluxe --and I realized that I was a vibrator person after all. A very happy vibrator person, in fact. I used that model until I literally wore it out--the plastic dial broke after two and a half years, which seemed like a pretty good run for an $18 vibrator. I replaced it with an identical model, because I'm nothing if not brand loyal, and there really aren't a lot of vibrators to choose from at the low end of the intensity scale. (Is my clit just hypersensitive? Really, some of the more intense models scare me a little). I also like the fact that the Crystal Jelly is fairly quiet, and it has a good texture. When it comes to things I rub against my sensitive bits, I prefer squishy and pliable to metallic or plastic. The little nubby things can be fun, too. Theoretically this vibrator is also a G-spot stimulator, but as long as I'm in TMI land I may as well say that the main thing I experience when my G spot is stimulated is an overwhelming urge to pee, so I can't speak to its functionality in that particular area.
A couple years ago I thought I would branch out into other models. I was curious whether the more expensive vibrators were actually worth the money, and after doing a lot of research I finally ended up with the G-twist vibe, which costs about $65. I picked it in part because it had several features I liked in the Crystal Jelly: it's quiet, it's got a soft squishy surface rather than a hard plastic one, and it's relatively low-intensity (though rated a 3 rather than a 2 on the Good Vibes scale, which is bordering on a little too intense for me sometimes). It comes in a whole range of attractive colors. (I picked purple, because I may as well think of Lex Luthor when I'm, um, thinking of Lex Luthor).
It's also silicone, which means it's more nonporous and easier to clean, and it's got some lovely ridges winding all around it that I didn't originally think would matter very much but turn out to be a very pleasant feature, indeed. The G twist model does have two drawbacks, however: the mechanism to remove the cap to place the batteries is very difficult to open, and the mechanism for adjusting the power levels is too easy to accidentally switch on. I've ended up draining the batteries unintentionally quite a few times because of that. I recommend rechargeable batteries, by the way. One's orgasms should not be endagering the planet, if one can possibly avoid that outcome.
And for that reason, I'd been looking for a vibrator that sat on a recharging base. Good Vibrations has several of these, but the one I've been lusting after for the last six months or so was the Womolia. 9 speeds! Medical grade materials! Rechargeable! Plus I just thought it looked pretty cool. But $132 seemed a lot of money to drop on a vibrator when I already had two perfectly functional ones. After dithering around for a long time, last week I finally gave into temptation and bought it.
So was it worth $132? I think probably yes, at least for me, for several reasons. I love the variations in the speed--both the low and medium intensity ranges work really well for me. I also think it's absolutely perfectly shaped for my body (though your body may vary). One thing I really love about it is the fact that it has three modes: one with constant buzzing, one that pulses at regular intervals, and one that pulses at irregular intervals--and you can use any of the three speeds in the three modes. It's particularly helpful for me because I have some incipient carpal tunnel issues, so that fact that I can set it on pulse mode means it can be very effective as a hands-free vibrator, which is something I'd been looking for for a while. There is one serious drawback, though: the higher speeds are very noisy. The buzzing sounds like an alarm clock going off, which can be rather distracting! Nevertheless, I find the pulsing mode to be very, very awesome. If you can put up with the noise factor and the high cost factor, I would definitely recommend it.
So what about you--do you have any good vibrators to recommend?
no subject
Glad you liked the review!